Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Lost in the Wilderness of Prosperity


Today we are in cherry blossom abundance, when spring reluctantly nudges in, after a cold and wet Japanese winter. No other flowering better teases out the national sensual selfie. We are in the pink, religiously snapping away on one-hundred and twenty-five million cellular phones.

I take two Ibuprofen to augment the battery of medicine I consume for Parkinson's. Despite a blissful outside, I shutter within my perfected home of opulence. Lucky is an understatement. Sponsoring the vitality-rich adventures of my three children, now scattered geographically in a world of possibility... I live in the lap of luscious aloneness. My week sprinkled with delightful cerebral communion, quietly distanced from the hum of urban clatter in my mountain-high suburbia, Hieidaira.

I struggle to calm a dilapidated neurological rat's nest. I have the shakes, constipation, muscle rigidity and the anxiety prone mind melt of any self-absorbed PDer. In a life of a billion great adventures, it is only right I now must face one more challenge... one more dimension to the human web of contradictions.

Perhaps most mysterious now, in the simplest of daily steps, my making choices. I live in my head of indecisiveness. Swallowed by the symptoms of my descent...  I "enny, meeny, miny, moe" my day away. Sauntering sadly to the beat of ill at ease. Lost in a banquet of plausible options. In like a lion, out like a lamb.